


high for this

by zouis



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Drug Addiction, I really don't know, M/M, lame ending, what happened here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-14
Updated: 2013-04-14
Packaged: 2017-12-08 11:34:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,339
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/760876
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zouis/pseuds/zouis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I don’t have the money, but I can pay you back, I swear,” louis promises, eyes wide, and he wonders how insane he must look with the same shirt he’d been wearing for a week and track pants that were stained with ash and alcohol. </p>
<p>(or the one where louis is addicted to drugs and offers his body in exchange for them)</p>
            </blockquote>





	high for this

**Author's Note:**

> a fwb fic with a surprising lack of smut hahahha
> 
> for the prompt: A friends with benefits(ish) AU! Where Zayn is Louis' drug dealer but since Louis' ran out of money he uses sex so that Zayn can give him drugs. Something angsty but will eventually be fluff :)
> 
> This is a fill for the zouis ficathon which you can find [here](http://louisarse.livejournal.com/5255.html)!

the first time louis realises he’s out of money, he sells his tv. it was a small price to pay, he thought, to feed the thing that had consumed his life. 

so he meets zayn, five hundred dollar notes tucked in his pocket which he happily trades for the powder. 

\--

the next time that he’s out of money, he’s _really_ out of money. he’s sold off everything, including his education. 

the flat he moved into was grungy, one room with a tiny bathroom. he doesn’t mind the lack of space, though, it’s worth it. 

so he sees zayn again, this time with most of the money in ripped fivers and tens. 

“sure you can keep this up?” zayn asks, looking at louis like he’s _worried_ for him.

“I can find a way to.” 

\-- 

when his bag is empty, he runs to zayn’s house and bangs on the door until the lad opens the door, his jeans slung low on his hips without a shirt, and hair wet. 

“I don’t have the money, but I can pay you back, I swear,” louis promises, eyes wide, and he wonders how insane he must look with the same shirt he’d been wearing for a week and track pants that were stained with ash and alcohol. 

zayn looks uncertain, hand shifting as though zayn was fighting the urge to shut the door in louis’ face. 

“please, i’ll do anything, zayn. I need it.” 

zayn quirks an eyebrow, but invites louis in. 

that night louis leaves with his baggie filled, and the taste of zayn’s come on his tongue. 

\--

it gets simple after that. louis’ stash would run out, and he’d go to zayn’s and end up on his knees. 

it was a cycle, a constant. louis liked knowing what to expect with zayn. 

so the night that zayn rolls louis over and returns the favour confuses him. 

it doesn’t stop him from fucking up into the tight heat of zayn’s mouth and coming with his name on his lips. 

when he leaves, it’s with confusion as well. 

\--

the first night that louis lets zayn fuck him, it’s when he’s desperate for the powder that he’s become so accustomed to. 

zayn spreads him with slow, careful fingers, pressing soft kisses to louis’ neck. 

when he pushes in, he slows his thrusts until louis is fully relaxed, and even then keeps it sweet. 

it’s almost like he cares for louis. 

but louis only cares for what zayn supplies him with. 

\--

louis wakes up next to zayn, his stash refilled on the bedside table beside him. 

he slips out quietly, covering himself with one of zayn’s hoodies that were too big on him. 

all it cost him was his dignity.

\--

louis’ hands are holding the headboard tightly, zayn’s body covering his as he thrusts into him with an insatiable hunger, louis in nothing but the hoodie he’d ‘borrowed’ from zayn the last time. 

“love you in my clothes, lou, fuck,” zayn muttered into his ear, his hands digging bruises into louis’ hips. 

when louis comes, it’s moaning zayn’s name without any thought to the real reason he was letting zayn use him in the first place. 

\--

an unknown number calls him the next day, and louis picks up just as the high has gotten to his head. 

“lou, it’s zayn.” 

“zayn?” 

“yeah, I was wondering if you’d want to come over. I’ve got some new pot from this new dealer and I thought we could try together.” 

louis smiles sadly. “I don’t know if I should.” 

“no, come on, it’s meant to be really good.” 

“I-” louis pauses, sighing and nodding into thin air. “I’ll be over in ten.” 

that night, zayn shows louis how to shotgun, and then fucks him into oblivion on the couch, louis’ hands scrambling for purchase as zayn hit _that_ spot inside of him. 

\--

“louis, want to catch a movie with me?” zayn asks on a monday night, just before louis is going to take a hit. 

“I can’t afford it,” louis admits, embarrassed of that fact for the first time since moving into the new flat. he needed to be high for this.

“no, no, I’ll pay for you.” 

“I don’t have anything to wear.” 

“I have clothes you can wear. c’mon, lou, I want to hang out with you.” 

“I- okay.” louis finds himself walking to zayn’s place, not once thinking that he hadn’t taken that hit he’d been so desperate for.

zayn gives him a pair of pyjama pants and a dumb shirt that hangs mid-way down louis’ thighs. 

at the pictures, zayn holds louis’ hand and buys him the biggest popcorn size the cinema has to offer. he grins at louis and listens to all his stories of home.

for the first time in months, louis is smiling and meaning it.

\--

“louis,” zayn says, hand intertwined with louis’. “does this mean something to you?” 

“does what?” 

“us, this. this thing.”

louis gaped, looking down at their hands, and up to zayn’s eyes. “I thought it was just- for the coke.” 

he sees zayn’s face fall, and when it does he instantly wants to take it back. 

“yeah... yeah, I was just making sure.” 

but zayn’s not fooling anyone, and louis has never felt worse.

\--

louis is awoken by a banging on the door. he rolls out of the mattress he has sitting in the corner of his room and opens to see zayn. 

“we need to talk.” 

louis nods, biting his lip as he looks around his flat, a table made of empty boxes of pizza, and small objects placed randomly around the floor. he takes a seat on his mattress.

“you. this is where you live?” 

louis nods again, blushing softly. 

“shit, you should have. you could have stayed with me.” 

“it doesn’t bother me that much, don’t worry. what did you want to talk about?” 

zayn takes a deep breath, sitting beside louis on the mattress. “look. this thing with us. I really like you lou.” 

and that’s what louis had been afraid of.

“I want to be with you, to wake up and have you beside me. I want to see you in my clothes all the time. I want you.” 

louis shrugs, playing coy, “you have me, z.” 

zayn laughs, almost manically as he tugs at his hair, mussing the styled quiff. “I want to be _with_ you louis. I, you know what? fuck it. I love you.” 

louis’ eyes widen, mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water. 

“I shouldn’t. I really, really shouldn’t. but I can’t help it, and I do.” 

zayn sighs, turning to face louis. “can you say something, please?” 

“I’m not sure what to say,” he admits, staring at zayn intently. “I don’t know what I feel, zayn. all I know is that you make me smile and _nobody_ does that. you make me want to get clean and go back to uni and do what I’d wanted to do with my life. you make me want to turn my life around and I don’t know why.” 

zayn smiles, reaching out and tangling his fingers with louis’. “I know you’re scared. fuck, I’m petrified. but. for you I want to try.” 

louis grins, his eyes watering slightly, which makes him embarrassed. “god, do you see what you do to me?” 

“I love you.” 

\--

that night, louis rides zayn slowly, a grin that can’t be removed on his lips and small noises of pleasure falling from his parted mouth. 

zayn’s hands stroke softly into his skin, and louis comes when zayn lets out a whispered, “I’m in love with you,” along with a kiss to his collarbone. 

“I love you,” louis mutters back. 

and yeah, they have a long way to go, and louis is scared for the road ahead. 

but as he lays down beside zayn on his shitty mattress in his shitty flat, pillowing his head on zayn’s chest, he thinks - no, he knows he can do it.

as long as zayn’s there beside him.


End file.
